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Posts Tagged ‘dress to impress’

Life is Funny. Ha, ha.

“Life is funny.” Whoever said that was more of a comedian than a philosopher.

I was in a bit of a fix on Labor Day weekend. I was to attend a party that I thought was to be informal. My sister had forwarded me an email and I missed the “dress-to-impress” part. Not that I am ever in the running as a finalist for GQ’s latest poll, but even I got a bit concerned.

I decided that a navy blue sport coat might get me by. The naysayers all said the mall would be closed on Labor Day, but I labored anyway.

I entered the shopping center in the nick of time, headed straight to Macy’s and found that my quick- buy might turn out to be quick-ruin as the tight side of me plummeted into sticker-shock.

“I never even wear jackets anymore,” I told myself, trying to rationalize my frugality. Finally, I found a price that “suited” me, a nearly-$300 jacket marked down to $109! Well, if I had planned this better, I could have done better at a Goodwill store. So, a hundred bucks was about as good as I was going to get on a holiday.

The friendly salesman said, “It’s Labor Day and I think we can do even better!” Joy! Rapture! Hallelujah! After he had swiped my card for a total of $87, he told me it was a better jacket than some of the others at four times the price. All of sudden, I didn’t feel cheap, I felt well-dressed.

I hopped on the Garden State Parking Lot, I mean Parkway. Oy, vey! Labor Day traffic near the Jersey shore. What did I expect? At this rate, I’ll have paid $87 for a ten-minute affair. But this was my cousin’s daughter’s reception and this big spender was sparing no expense.

Whew! I made it there in plenty of time. The first person I bump into was Jeff Stopper, my old buddy.

“I think I just passed you out on the street,” he blurted. “I had to go back to my car to take my suit jacket off because it was so hot in here.”

I didn’t say a word. I kept my jacket on and borrowed a handkerchief.

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